Dealing with the Bully Threat

Dear Parents,

Our children return to school in a few days. We all know that the school experience should be one of the best in our child's life. But sadly it often is not. In the US the statistic is that 3 to 4 out of 10 children are bullied to the point where it can significantly effect their lives. Everyone has been bullied to some extent, but many find their own answers.

Bakc when I was a child, the problem existed, but was more isolated than it is today. The fast numbers of children I talk with daily, who are or have been bullied is staggering.

So, what are parents to do? First, for the parents, get as much information on the problem as you can find. I provide links from my different website to resources that I have checked out personally and recommend at different levels. So really, do I need to know all this? YES, don't think that your son or daughter is going to come and tell you how sever the problem is. Remember there is a threat about telling. Children believe the bully has all the power.

I have been teaching martial arts for almost 25 years now. I develop a close relationship with the students and many of the parents. I have the privilege of watching these children grow up. I deal daily with children who are bullied and often with the bullies themselves.

Why does someone become a bully?

1. Low Self Esteem
2. They have been bullied themselves.
3. Love the feeling of power.
4. Pier pressure - their friends do it.
5. They learned it from their parents!!!

What type of child is a victim?

1. Someone with low Self Esteem and confidence
2. Someone who is physically different (glasses, hearing aids, different coloured hair etc.)
3. Emotional children
4. Obese children, also those who are very skinny.
5. Quiet children.

How do we fix it? First and foremost, RAISE SELF ESTEEM.......

More on this in my next posting,


Master Art Mason
Founder: The Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute
519-962-9820

PS. Take a look at the WEBSITE. I have read parts of this work. It is worth the investment.

Information for Parents

Dear Parents,

IS your child being torments at school, in the park, maybe even in your back yard. You need to arm yourself with as much information as you can get. Check out the link below.

Defeat The Bully!

Yours in raising strong, confident children,

Master Art Mason

More on Bullies

Dear Parents,

Thought I'd share a pretty good article
regarding dealing with Bully's - and,
a few thoughts.

The article is available at:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/8756912&&CM=EmailThis&CE=1

I've taught for years that the solution is
usually a "middle ground" between
"Fighting Back" and, "Running Away"

The best solution is to learn to communicate
in a CONFIDENT but, Non-Threatening way.

The article does allude to the possibility
of "Getting back in a Bully's face"
Probably not the best advice if done too
aggressively - however, standing your
ground and politely but firmly refusing to
be pushed around is usually the best
solution.

More in classes....

Thanks!

Master Art Mason
Founder: The Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute
519-962-9820
http://www.thepeacefulwarriors.org

Martial Arts classes can lower agression in a child

Dear Parents,

There is no better way to find out if a martial arts education is right for your child then to talk with other parents who's children are involved. So here is another success story of two children, both Peaceful Warrirors' and how the arts have impacted and changed their lives for the positive!

"My sons have always been what you would call a 'handful', premature babies often are. My one son had been suspended in grade1, several times, for hands on. For six years I brought them to all the age appropriate agencies within the city for some kind of help for them. Some progress was made, but it was very limited.

Then about 4 years ago, my sons were about six, someone had recommended martial arts to me. I thought "Are you crazy? You actually want me to give my kid the ability to beat someone up? I can see it now, he is going to be expelled from school in the second grade. No way! It's not going to happen." That was my attitute for the next couple of years, all the while still trying to get them the help they needed and deserved. My point of view changed when I heard a story of a child who was like mine and how The Peaceful Warriors' helped him to be able to overcome his anger and agression at school. I has to check things out for myself, so I did. I brought the
boys there to see what they did and one son thought it was a license to kill. This worried me, but the way the children are taught is about self defense and discipline. It is not about beating people up. This was something they very quickly learned and that attitude would not be tolerated. Soon the worry about my son being expelled from school was a distant memory. They are doing much better, socially, in school and the hands on incidents have not been an issue.

If your children are having a difficult time in school or at home the masters are there to listen and help with the problem. If they can they will present the situation to the class and use it as a lesson for the rest of the class without belittleing anyone. It is done with the upmost respect for the child and parents involved.

As a parent I would recommend The Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute to anyone who cares about his or her child."


Bre-Ann S. Windsor mother of 2 Peaceful Warriors'


Find out today what is possible for your child! Give us a call at 519-962-9820 and talk with an instructor today! Martial Arts in not just an activity for kids to spend time on. It is a life changing education!

Your in the arts,


Master Art Mason,
Founder: The Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute
519-962-9820
http://www.thepeacefulwarriors.org

Study: Obese Kids More Prone To Be Bullied

May 03, 2004, 01:23:40 PM

Obese kids rate quality of life as low as cancer patients Overweight adolescents are more likely than normal-weight children to be victims of bullying, or bullies themselves, a study found, bolstering evidence that being fat endangers emotional as well as physical health.

The results in a study of 5,749 Canadian youngsters echo data from British research and follow a U.S. study published last year in which obese children rated their quality of life as low as young cancer patients' because of teasing and weight-related health problems.

While not surprising given the stigma of being overweight, the new findings underscore the importance of enlisting teachers and schools in the fight to prevent and treat obesity in children, said lead author Ian Janssen, an obesity researcher at Queens University in Kingston, Ontario.
"Anybody's who's ever been on a playground would know" that overweight children are among those who get picked on, Janssen said, adding that in some cases, that may lead the youngsters to become bullies themselves.

The study appears in the May edition of Pediatrics, released Monday.

Janssen said obesity rates in Canadian children tripled from the 1980s to 1990s and show no signs of slowing down, similar to rising rates in other developed nations and in the United States, where 15 percent of school-age youngsters are obese and increasingly plagued by related health problems. Nearly one-third of American children are overweight.
Social isolation

The toll on emotional health is just as worrisome, the researchers said.
"The social and psychological ramifications induced by the bullying-victimization process may hinder the social development of overweight and obese youth, because adolescents are extremely reliant on peers for social support, identity and self-esteem," the researchers said.
Their data is based on a national survey of Canadian youngsters, ages 11 to 16, conducted in 2002.

Among normal-weight youngsters, almost 11 percent said they were victims of bullying, compared with 14 percent of overweight youngsters and nearly 19 percent of obese youngsters.
About 8 percent of normal-weight children said they were perpetrators, compared with 11 percent of overweight youngsters and 9 percent of the obese children.
Obese boys and girls were more than two times more likely than normal-weight youngsters to be victims of "relational" bullying -- being intentionally left out of social activities. Obese girls were about twice as likely to be physically bullied on a weekly basis as normal-weight girls; among obese boys the risk was slightly lower but still substantially higher than for normal-weight boys.

Obese girls were more than five times more likely than normal-weight girls to physically bully other youngsters at least once weekly. Among boys the risk of being physically aggressive was only slightly increased, but they were more than twice as likely to make fun of others and spread lies and rumors than normal-weight boys.

Cleveland child psychologist Sylvia Rimm, author of "Rescuing the Emotional Lives of Overweight Children," said many schools with anti-bullying programs don't specifically address overweight youngsters.

Rimm said reducing bullying could help youngsters overcome their weight problems. Bullying perpetuates those problems because it isolates them, and "the only thing left for overweight kids is food and television," she said.

Is Your Child Harassed by Bullies?

Is Your Child Harassed by Bullies?
(He or she may be – and you might not even know!)
Can Karate, Martial Arts, Tae Kwon Do help solve this problem?


Dear Fellow Parents,

Let me tell you about a kid I know named Tyler.

Tyler was usually enthusiastic and happy. His cheery disposition and bright smile went with him
wherever he went. But when he began 4th grade, his parents began to notice some changes.

Tyler was becoming more and more withdrawn. He often seemed uneasy, and less sure of himself than ever before.

In third grade, Tyler was always eager to get outside to play after school. Weekends were happily spent in family activities.

But now, Tyler stayed around the house, keeping to himself. He seemed reluctant to talk about friends, school, or much of anything else.

Tyler’s parents didn’t know what to make of it…but they knew something wasn’t right.

A call to the school teacher was made. Tyler’s teacher, Mrs. Phillips, said, as if Mom and Dad should have known about it all along, “He’s probably upset about Sam. Sam has been giving Tyler a hard time for quite a while now.” So there it was.

Tyler had a bully problem.

Most parents have found their child in this situation before. As a parent, you can’t help but feel angry, bewildered and totally unsure of what to do.


What I’m about to tell you next will seem kind of hard to understand? But if you think back to when you were a kid, and recall how small you felt, and how big the world seemed, perhaps you can remember

Kids with bully problems feel ashamed.

Are you aware that most kids who are being bothered by bullies don’t tell their parents? They just “suffer in silence.”

Because they feel embarrassed, they usually don’t tell anybody. Not their parents. Not their friends. Not the people at school.

You can imagine what suffering this type of harassment is doing to their Self-Esteem… And all the while, you don’t even know there is a problem.

For many kids, this is the first “grown up” problem they ever have to encounter. And they keep the whole, disturbing thing on their own young, inexperienced shoulders.

And – even if you eventually do find out about it –

What are you going to do?

Chances are, you feel just about as unsure as Tyler probably does.


• Maybe you will call Sam’s parents, and talk the situation over with them? Reason with them? Good luck. You see, there’s a reason why Sam is a bully. And when you eventually call his parents, you will probably see what that reason is. Most likely, Sam’s parents will be defensive and uncooperative.


• Will you call the school? Probably. But, remember, school officials get these calls all the time. Most teachers and administrators would like to help…but they don’t have the answers, either. They will probably just remind you that if Tyler should try to defend himself, he will be kicked out of school, right alongside the kids who is the cause of the problem.


• You might encourage Tyler to stand up for himself; to defend himself. But you and I both know that Tyler is probably no match for the bully. And, even if he was, what good will getting him expelled do (see above)?

• Besides – and this is important – do you really want to teach him that fighting is the answer? I will tell you (and, remember, I have 20 years experience in the Martial Arts), fighting is not the answer. If Tyler resorts to fighting this bully, there is always a bigger, tougher bully waiting for him.



So – you do what parents usually do.

You tell Tyler to avoid Sam. And you unwittingly set into motion a series of events that will have Tyler like running and hiding from trouble, feeling like a victim…feelings that could very well follow him for the rest of his life.

Or worse and I hate to even mention this…sometimes the “Tyler’s” of this world responds to their anger and frustration by becoming the bully.

You lose, either way.

And so, of course, does Tyler. Does any of this sound familiar?

Believe me. I understand how you are feeling. After all, I’m a parent too, and I understand how you feel. I also remember how I felt when I had to deal with the neighborhood “tough guy” at 10 years old. That’s why I started martial arts lessons – and, my problems were solved – without ever having to use any physical skills what-so-ever.

In coaching them…and in “raising” the other 20,00 or so kids we’ve dealt with over the last 21 years as a martial art instructor, I’ve learned a thing or two about teaching children to handle these disturbing bully problems.

Now, read carefully. I’m going to tell you a secret.

If you understand what I’m about to tell you, you will have the “key” to resolving this entire, frustrating situation.

The Secret: Some kids don’t get picked on at all.

That’s right. Some kids don’t get picked on – at all.


They don’t pick on other kids, either. They are free to enjoy themselves, to be themselves…and it wouldn’t even occur to a bully to give them a hard time.

What I can do for you.

It’s pretty simple, really. I’m just going to take your child out of the group of kids that get picked on – and put him or her in the group of kids that doesn’t get picked on.

And, I’m going to do it without turning your nice child into one of those “tough guys.”

That’s a big claim, isn’t it? After all, if I can really do what I say, not only will this solve a sticky problem for you…it will place your child, once again, on the road to a level of self-esteem that will empower him or her to do anything. No “victim” mentality. No running and hiding.

No being ashamed of something that isn’t his or her fault.

So how does it work?

It will take about 15 minutes for one of my instructors to explain it to you. And, I guarantee the answer will surprise you. I have locations around the Windsor / Essex county area including Windsor, Belle River, St. Clair Beach and Essex. Karate, martial arts, can help your child overcome this problem, without violence!

Now, you may want to first try some of the alternative “strategies” I’ve listed above – but I suspect you already have, and are just about fed up with having your kid be pushed around.

So don’t wait. Just call my office at 519-566-6610, or email info@thepeacefulwarriors.org and we will set up a time for your visit with a Master Teacher.


If you call now you will receive, with no obligation:

1. A FREE private consultation of one of our Master Instructors

2. 2 FREE introductory lessons at The Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute, with no obligation



We will be providing this as a community service for a limited time and have limited capacity for this special program – so please call now to reserve your space.



Yours for Better Kids,



Master Art Mason
Founder: The Peaceful Warriors’ Martial Arts

PS. See what Karate or the martial arts can do for your child!

P.S.S Check us out on the WEB at http://www.thepeacefulwarriors.org