Cyberbullying

Cyber Bullying

Most parents are very unaware of the latest bully issue confronting their children. This is 'cyber' bullying. Teenagers and children with cellphones, and computers who are being harassed by bullies via email, text messages and chat rooms. Here is a link to a website with a ton of information on how to go about solving this problem. Most parents are totally unaware that this is happening to their children. Girls are the most common victim here.

Bullying and the Arts

I have been asked on a few occasions how martial arts can be an effective tool to combat bullying. At first it all seems clear. I’ll put my child in class so he can learn to fight. However, nothing could be further from the truth. I recall a number of years ago in class Master Mason asking the students the following question: how many of you joined the school so you could learn how to fight? Of course with great eagerness, a number of the new students immediately threw up their hands. Much to their surprise Master Mason told them that the Peaceful Warriors’ (and for that matter, martial arts) were not about fighting. The look on many of the student’s faces was that of surprise and confusion. That statement has remained with me and has caused me to spend a considerable amount of time reading about bullying and how and where martial arts can be an asset, and not in the way the majority of society would think - fighting.

The following represents some of the issues I think parents and students may find informative about this topic and how martial arts fit into this problem.

First, what is bullying? Is it something that we need to define? Don’t we all know what it is and how to recognize it? I’m not so sure. What some may call bullying, others may just call a game. So what makes a particular incident a case of bullying? For one thing, certain conditions must exist. Many children joke around every day with each other, call each other names, and some times take part in some fairly physical play. Yet these incidents are not considered bullying. The difference between this type of play and bullying is the relationship between the bully and the victim. Bullying is a wilful, conscious desire to hurt, threaten to frighten another person. Most often there is a power imbalance between the two. Bullying is not limited to the physical world, bullying can come in many forms of intimidation. It can be verbal, touching or just a sneer or glance. Bullying knows no boundaries and can affect everyone in society. It can last a short or period of time and can leave lasting impressions on all who have experienced it.

So how can martial arts help outside of teaching self defence techniques? There are many benefits to martial arts training. These are not new to our society. Martial Arts have been empowering people for hundreds, perhaps thousands of years. Here are a few of the benefits particularly relating to “combating bullying”.

* Mental focus - learning in class how to execute kicks, punches, blocks and foreign self-defence techniques will require a significant amount of mental focus by the student. This focus will become a part of the student and spill over in both academic and social settings.
* Respect for self and others - the students are taught that one of the basic foundations of martial arts is that of respect for others. By bowing when entering and leaving the school, and paying proper respect to other students and instructors students also develop a healthy self respect.
* Self-esteem - martial arts have been shown to increase the self-esteem of those who join. As new students progress, small successes follow and soon they are able to accomplish things that only a short time ago seemed impossible. These achievements can not be under stated. It is these accomplishments, no matter how small they may seem to the instructor or parents that develop pride within the student.
* Discipline and self-control - martial arts provide a forum, which is very structured and focused on discipline. This atmosphere will instil a certain work ethic in the student, one that is important not only in the dojang but also in life.
* Sense of belonging - martial arts schools develop a spirit and a sense of camaraderie that is important to the student. Making new friends is often important for the development of adolescents.
* Physical fitness - martial arts training provides a cardiovascular workout as well as muscular strength. Those who train also develop a greater sense of balance as well as techniques to avoid injury.

Self-defence - although martial arts is not about learning to fight or to be the aggressor (the bully) it will, with the proper training and dedication, allow one to learn how to defend themselves.

So how do these points relate to bullying? Statistics show that most victims have few friends and have low self-esteem/self respect. These children are often viewed as a perfect target. Further, how they react to their first encounter will often dictate whether they will be a victim in the future. Children who can develop physical fitness, discipline, mental focus, self-esteem, respect for self and others, friendships and self defence awareness will gain an edge and will not look or react like a victim.
One last thing, notwithstanding all of the benefits to martial arts training, there should be continuous and open dialogue between parents and their children. Children are often embarrassed and/or afraid to talk about this subject. One of the most important things that parents can stress to their kids is that;
1. It’s not your fault if you are being bullied, and
2. You don’t have to face it alone.

Kevin Miller
3rd Dan Black Belt Hapkido / Tae Kwon Do
St Clair Beach Owner/ Certified Instructor

Back to School

With the return of school in the next few weeks comes the return of the bully problem for many, many children. I know of one family were the youngest is already stressed out and crying because school is only 3 weeks away. This is a very sad situation.

As parents your job can be very difficult having to deal with this. The schools are powerless to help you, even though they will say they are doing everything they can do. Your child's self esteem will suffer as the time draws near for school and even more once school starts.

So, what can you do to help your child through this problem. You must teach your child to stand up to this fear! Remember, bullies feed off the fear of the children or adults they are tormenting. Also, the problem is never as bad as the child thinks. He or she has replayed this possible outcomes in their mind so many times, that it can paralyze them.

My advice, if you have not already done so, check out the martial arts schools in your area. If possible enroll your child in one that is run by FULL TIME career martial artists. Since these men and women are professionals who teach for a living you know you will be getting the best possible instruction.

Whatever you do, don't cheap out! Community Center Martial Arts is a great activity. It won't help with your bully issues. It won't help build self esteem. Your child needs and deserves the best you can find.

Preventing Bullying

As soon as children begin to interact with others, we can begin to teach them not to be bullies and not to be bullied. We can give them words for their feelings, limit and change their behavior and teach them better ways to express their feelings and wishes. Children do not learn to solve these kinds of problems and get along by themselves. We need to teach them.

When preschoolers begin to call people names or use unkind words, intervene immediately and consistently. In kindergarten children learn the power of exclusion. We begin to hear things like, "She's not my friend and she can't come to my party." Respond with, "You don't have to be friends with her today, but it's not all right to make her feel bad by telling her she can't come to your party."

In the early elementary grades, cliques and little groups develop which can be quite exclusionary and cruel. Children need to hear clearly from us, "It's not all right to treat other people this way. How do you think she feels being told she can't play with you? Kids don't have to play with everyone or even like everyone, but they can't be cruel about excluding others.

Boys who are physically small or weak are more prone to victimization. Making fun, picking on and other forms of bullying need to be identified in their earliest stages. The message needs to be crystal clear: This is not okay. Think about how he must feel. How could you include him and let other kids know its not all right to treat others this way?
Children who are not bullies or victims have a powerful role to play in shaping the behavior of other children. Teach your children to speak up on behalf of children being bullied. "Don't treat her that way, it's not nice." "Hitting is not a good way to solve problems, let's find a teacher and talk about what happened."

For information on how martial arts can help teach your child to deal with bullies, call 519-962-9820 or email instructor@thepeacefulwarriors.org

Master Art Mason

Attention Parents! Is your child safe?

Attention Parents! Is your child Safe?


Our world is becoming more dangerous by the minute. Children are being molested, abducted, murdered and hurt in our cities and on our streets. Is there anything that can be done to make our children safe, aside from taking the law into our own hands? Yes there is! Education is the answer. The more you and your children know and understand how predators work and think the better.

Surprisingly there are few groups in Canada and the United States that are really interested in helping children, until now. On Sunday June 22nd 2008 Art Mason's Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute launched their new information website called The Kid's Safe Canada Network.

This website is dedicated to providing FREE to the public information on how to teach your child to be "street smart" and avoid problems with predators, and even school yard bullies!

It doesn't matter were you live in this world, the information provided on this website will benefit you! Bookmark the site and visit often!

Go to http://www.kidsafecanada.net

If you register for this site you will be added to a mail list which will keep you apprised of workshops and seminars in your area.

Registration, like the website is totally FREE.

Yours in building strong confident children,

Master Art Mason
Founder: Art Mason's Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute
Founder: Kids Safe Canada Network

Children Don't Come with an Owners Manual

Dear Parents;

Are you are frustrated with trying to be the perfect parent and raise the perfect kids... I understand. I've raised three kids of my own and I've made a many mistakes along the way. However, thanks to my experience with the principles taught in the martial arts, I was able to instill inside my kids a sense of ethics, morals, self-esteem and confidence rarely seen in other kids their age. As I was raising my family, I was also helping hundreds of other children in my martial arts school learn "character" through these techniques.

I've created the most effective tools, techniques and strategies any parent can use to build stronger, happier, healthier kids. After 20 years of raising my own (and hundreds of other kids)... I've written down my system to share with other parents looking for a better way to insure their children's success.

After all, isn't it true you feel responsible for you children's success or failure? Now, we know we shouldn't feel that way, but we do. Parents will do whatever they can to give their kids the opportunities they never had. We can't help it. It is human nature to feel obligated to give our kids 110% of ourselves.

Although it looks like a book, it is really an "Owners Manual" that you wish your children had come with on day one. A step-by-step guide that makes child-raising brilliantly simple by taking you back to the basics. You'll gain universal and timeless strategies that guarantee wonderful results.

For more information please follow this link;

Yours in raising strong, confident children,

Master Art Mason
Founder: The Peaceful Warriors' Martial Arts Institute

The 10 Warning Signs of Low Self-Esteem

“People don’t often understand just how damaging having low self-esteem can be! People with low self esteem are often go unnoticed at school and at work because they do not do anything to stand out. They don’t ever go for the goal or even try to make the sports team.”

“Low Self Esteem Sufferer’s are often the target of bullies at school as well as at work because they “bullies” know they won’t give them any hassle or a hard time and will be “easy” victims who will quickly bend to their will!”

The 10 Warning Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

1. Walking with head and eyes down focused on the ground instead of Straight ahead.
2. Shy and Reserved around new people and situations
3. She does not ask questions in school or at home
4. Hard for her to make friends
5. Poor Hygiene
6. Lack of Goals and Ambition
7. Struggles to get out of bed
8. Fails to believe she can do anything meaningful or worthwhile, so she never even tries!
9. Does not try new things in fear of looking foolish and failing
10. A Victim of a Bully!

These are just SOME of the warning signs of Low Self-Esteem you may be seeing in yourself or your child. You do not necessarily show all of these warning signs, just one is enough to suffer from Low Self-Esteem.

To discover how to raise your or your child’s Self-Esteem call us at

(519) 962-9820 and learn what you can do to become or help your child become a STRONG and CONFIDENT person!

http://www.thepeacefulwarriors.org